passionpop: (completely)
Previous: Switzerland 

France/France

Jessy Matador - Alllez Olla Olé



The only live clips I could find this close to the event were all rehearsals for the actual Eurovision event, and I didn't want to ruin the spectacular... so here is the promo clip. Classy isn't it.... Don't get the American flag though

I think this is France's best chance in years. it is just a typical summer hit song with an element of football chant, perfect for a World Cup summer. Could French translate to a win this year... well France hasn't won since 1977 and, forgive me if I am wrong, but the last song in any form of French that has won Eurovision was.... Celine Dion in 1988 (for Switzerland)

This is fairly long odds to win, at 124, but I am not ruling this out completely. It really depends on how drunk Europe is when it is time to vote and if I am anything to go by, this could be messy.

For the final Piece of Eurovision history for 2010... lets go to 1982 when the French broadcaster decided Eurovision had become a joke and refused to enter.... of we could turn back time 50 years to Jacqueline Boyer with 'Tom Pillibi'... wee wee wee (I head that said in the clip and had to quote it...)




thats all the songs for 2010.... OMG! that was painful
passionpop: (completely)
Previous: Russia

Switzerland/Suisse

Michael von der Heide - 'Il Pleut de L'Or'


If David Bowie had a Child and its mother was an elf, I imagine that this is what the spawn would look like. actually... the song isnt much, but... I like the bowie elf... 

What I find interesting about Michael von der Heide is that he has covered Nick Cave. Yes thats far better than the Lisa Mitchell crap that the German chick has covered. this thing is though, it was "Where the Wild Roses Grow' that Michael covered.... Still Nick Cave.... though I think Michael is a bit more of a Kylie fan if you ask me... also Michael did the Kylie vocals with Kuno Lauener Doing Mr Cave's... but still points for trying... Your choice in Australian music can be interpreted as being better than Lena's.

Nobody can hate Switzerland but that doesn't mean anyone likes them and I doubt this will even come close to winning. even if he learns to dance before Eurovision, it wont save this song.

Every year it seems, I post 'Refrain' up as Eurovision history. This is mainly because ti is the only song from the first Eurovision I can find on Youtube. I am over 'Refrain'. Instead, I wll post from 1957, 'L'enfant que j'étais' by the same person who sung 'refrain'. How do you go from winning one year and coming 3rd last the next...


passionpop: (putting my foot in it)
Previous: Spain

Russia/Russie

Peter Nalitch and Friends - Lost and Forgotten



Russia didnt enter the Eurovision until 1994 and it appears that Russia has decided to make up for the decades that it missed. this year is the 1970's. Actually, it might be 1950's meets the Mammas and papas meets traditional Russian music. if the mammas and papas re-wrote 'Fiddler on the Roof' and based it in the 1950's, this song would almost certainly be on the soundtrack.

If you haven't fallen asleep by the time this song starts (and it is the second song in the first semi), you soon will be. Russia should continue doing pop music and this song should really be 'Lost and Forgotten'.

The Highlight of this performance is Peter Nalitch's Eyebrows (he has two of them... just). these eyebrows are entities in themselves. I cant believe people voted for this. Seriously Russia, study how voting works... I am sure you can learn how.

Anyways, going back to 'better' times and Russias pop history. 2002, when Russia was being told what a Prime Minister was as they 'sung' 'Northern Girl' and somehow finished 10th... yay for bloc voting.


passionpop: (Default)
 Previous: Cyprus

Poland/Pologne

Marcin Mrozinski - Legenda



You know how you get those songs that make you dizzy from them going around and around... well this is one of those. it appears to want to be on the sound-track of some fantasy film... Seriously, Lord of the Rings was so last decade, get with the program already

Remember, in the Eurovision Drinking game: High & loud obnoxious noises emitted from singer during their act = 2 fingers. thats what I give this act, two fingers, index and middle with y nals showing to the performers

Oh look it isnt that bad compared to everything else this year. I think it is like 'Fairytale' for adults, or at least thats what it is trying to be. This song does make one pose the question: are there any Straight male solo singers performing in this years Eurovision? hmmm

This year is Polands 15th Eurovision. no wins but they keep trying. In 1997, in their fourth Eurovision they sent Anna Maria Jopek with 'Ale Jestem', quite a pleasant song, but there were a number of interesting acts in 1997 (like Iceland), the year televoting was brought out in a number of countries in Europe for the event.

passionpop: (beer and tits)
 Previous: Georgia

Cyprus/Chypre

Jon Lilygreen & The Islanders - Life Looks Better In Spring



This is one song I cannot blame on an Idol-esk contest. Instead I have to blame my light, my love.... my internet... yes, the songwriters googled to get this song out into the world. I thought Googles motto was 'Don't be evil'... Google, you failed...

Its not that he wails, it is that he is from Wales and here he is representing Cyprus. The Song is written by Greek-Cypriots because only Greek-Cypriots seem to consider themselves Cypriots, Turkish-Cypriots consider themselves Turks living in Turkey (but physically in Cyprus, but they don't recognise Cyprus...*sigh*)... bloody Turkeys...

As for this song, I think it has potential, so much potential, it could potentially even be good. I think it will be the first time since 2005 that Cyprus will see the Final. He/They will get the nannas voting because it is a sweet song and the young girls voting for the 22 years olds looks.

Cyprus in Eurovision has changes since their first entry in 1981. sure they still (usually) trade12 points with Greece, but they now often give and get points form Turkey. the songs have improved marginally too...  as have the clothes

passionpop: (Default)
 Previous: Bulgaria

Gerogia/Géorgie

Sofia Nizharadze - Shine



Apologies for the sound quality on this one, and apologizes for the sounds omitted from your speakers. I possibly should put a warning that if you have a dog, it might try to sing along to this song. it is that kind of pitch really.

This sounds like an Idol 'winners single' sung by someone who can actually sing. My only problem is the dancers... they looks kinda... creepy... stalkerish... I think the performance needs to be simplified and maybe one less stalker dancer and this could work. maybe keep a nice tight routine around her and when she hits the big notes for them all to fall to the ground and slowly come back around her in a less stalkerish manner. yeah... weird Georgian dancers

Hanne Sørvaag, who co-wrote this song, also co-wrote Norway's entry this year. Both of these songs should be more successful than her entry in 2008 for Germany which deservingly finished 23rd. either of the artists Hanne worked with this year has more talent that the four girls who represented Germany combined. and yes, she can write songs for more than one country in a year, it is only the performers ('artists') who are limited to one country per year.

For the history lesson, we go to 2007, but a special mention goes out to 2009, which Georgia... well they got a little political over... POLITICS IN EUROVISION NEVER!! first they were talking of boycotting because of the Russian 'Invasion' (see also "humanitarian effort to prevent Georgia 'Ethnically cleansing' two internal regions) of Georgia, then they confirmed they would enter and sent a song in that went  'We Don't want to put in, I just want to shoot him'. The French media noted this sounded like a slur on Putin, the Russian president, and eventually, 2 weeks before finalisation of entries, Georgia was informed that their act breeched the rules as it brought the event into disrepute. Georgia cried and screamed and blamed the Russians and refused to change their entry and were disqualified. Makes you wonder, with the song and dance that Georgia made about hating Russia, how many votes will they get from Russian and its former Soviet allies... at least Georgia has a Norwegian songwriter this year in an attempt to get someone to vote for them... 



passionpop: (beer and tits)
 Previous: Albania

Bulgaria/Bulgarie

Miro - Angel Si Ti



This song will be interesting when he actually performs it live. and it would be nice if he performed rather than stood there being boring. bor-ing!

The start with the hand stand on the piano showed potential, but even if they tae the hand-stand to Eurovision, it wil only be the second most interesting piano in Eurovision after Russia in 2006. but if the hand stand guy comes out of the piano... wearing a tutu... then I will give that points

this needs work on its performance and then it can go top ten. the issue may be that there are alot of dance songs in this years contest so it may be a ballad year. 

Bulgaria have a habit of trying to show us they are a hip and happening country in Eurovision like this song from 1980-something... no... um... 2008. The break dancing at the start is cool...  remember moves like that from Primary School... 

passionpop: (putting my foot in it)
 Previous: Malta

Albania/Albanie

Juliana Pasha - Its All About You



This song is my wildcard for the year. watching this clip, it isn't much, it is a lame duck and Julianna shouldn't wear such figure hugging clothes. then I saw the presentation/promotion clip and that has more base and beats to it and it is not bad, I could see it as a dancefloor hit

This needs a much better live performance than what was delivered. you can have up to 6 people on stage and all vocals need to be performed live by someone on stage, so she will have (I think) 2 backing singers. if Albania has people who can dance and sing, then she might not need the other 3 performers. however statistically, 5 performers on stage is a winning start. I could see this being performed well with 2-3 backing vocalists/dancers and one male dancer. OMG I just visuallised the perfect typical Eurovision performance for this song... along the lines of Marie N from 2002, Classic Eurovision

This song could be a lot crapper, but it isn't. they have a quality singer, with a not so bad song. all they need is to have a fantastic performance and this could win. 

Albania has finished 17th for the last 3 years and did better prior to that. I will repeat the year 2006 in Eurovision history with 'Tomorrow I go', because it finished 16th and tried to have everything it needed for Eurovision, including copying parts of a previous winner... which is a drink in the Eurovision Drinking game

passionpop: (Default)
Previous: Finland

Malta/Malte

Thea Garrett - My Dream




Does Liza Minnelli know you stole her hair and dyed it? Does Disney know you have their next movies theme song? Did you know I almost fell asleep listening to this? and Thea, did you know the angel of death is standing behind you from about two minutes into the song? it is either the angel of death or a character from 'The Labyrinth', either way WTF Mate!

This is my dream, that I didn't have to listen to this song. it is one huge toilet break. the writes of this song are also known for writing for Chiara, Malta's biggest (atleast is physical size) female singer. Chiara represented Mata in Eurovision in 1998, 2005 and 2009. actually Chiara's first song in Eurovision was written by the guys who wrote this years entry (please note, out of the three times Chiara went to Eurovision, her worst song was the first one)

The Song is dull and weak, even in this years rather average competition. Thea also is weak on the lower notes. Malta wont win this year and will likely bring in the big guns next year to sing for them. yes, I predict Chiara will be back in 2011, thats the biggest gun Malta seems to have... 

Malta Competed in Eurovision three times in the 1970s before a bit of a hiatus, then came back in 1991 and has not missed a Eurovision since. Why suck a long Hiatus though... well if this was the best you could find to send t Eurovision, you probably should never go back to Eurovision... oh 1975...

passionpop: (sweet and innocent)

Previous: Moldova

Finland/Finlande

Kuunkuiskaajat - Työlki ellää



If Finland were brought in to write a Folk song for a spaghetti western and they have to sample Zorbas Dance for the song, this is what they would come up with. Yes, the idea of this sounds ridiculous, but did you hear the song?. there is no reasonable explanation for all of the themes I mentioned to go together and there is no reason why this song should be in Eurovision in 2010... unless Finland are taking the p!ss

Finland competed in all but 6 Eurovisions between 1961 and their first win in 2006, thats quite a dry-spell. I think if Finland keep sending stuff like this to Eurovision, then they might go about 4 decades before their next win. This wont win, I dont think it will even come close. I think it will be lucky if it makes the final.

The Best think about Finlands entry this year is the name: Kuunkuiskaajat. I think the only name I have seen this year that is better is from Iceland: Eyjafjallajökull. I love the Nordic countries. I bet their are people freezing their arses off in the north of Europe going:
person 1 'how shall we seek revenge on people in the pleasant climates...'
Person 2 'I know, get them to say 'Eyjafjallajökull' repetitively'
person 1 'what the hell is that meant to mean'
Person 2 'I don't know but we will tell them it is the name of Edgar's glacier.'

In 1963, Hula-hoops were not only a fun toy, but great stage decor. It was also the first time Finland finished last (something they have now done 9 times) and also he first time they received no points (which they have also managed to do a further 3 times since). what did the Jury have against Laila Halme and 'Muistojeni laulu' I wonder...


passionpop: (putting my foot in it)
Previous: Serbia

Moldova/Moldova

SunStroke Project & Olia Tira - Run away



though I not huge on this style of dance music I do like the Sax.. I haven't heard a sax like that since Guru Josh ('90's time for the guru'). the only Question I have though is that the fvck is with those crotch tassels... Please explain!

Vocally, her voice is very similar to Madonna, it is similar to those deep, robust tones that she has and I could see Madonna doing a similar song, wearing the same outfit... complete with crotch tassels.

In the dance genre this year, when performed live I think Romania has a stronger song... and they don't need crotch tassels. this song is no 'Boonika Bate Toba' and I don't think it will get top ten, i think they should 'Run-Away'

Sometimes you hear a Eurovision song and think it should be the theme song of Some Armageddon film. on 2007 Natalia Barbu sung 'Fight' and I just kept thinking... 'Where is Bruce Willis'... imgaine him with crotch tassels... *shudder*

passionpop: (putting my foot in it)
Previous: Israel

Serbia/Serbie

Milan Stanković - Ovo Je Balkan



is it just me or does this guy look like Corey Delaney. I mean he doesnt appear to be as big a twunt as Delaney, no one could be really, but give him yellow sunnies and a hoodie and he has the look. Everyone has commented on Milan's unique sense of style and I think i have shot that down.

I want to hate this song, it is ethnopop by an idolist, it is everything i hate, but the song isnt too bad. it also has a reasonable chance of doing well. it will get the Former Yugoslav vote, the Former Russian countries wont shun it, it has mid song costume changes, a young 'fashionista' boy who the young girls will vote for and the gay boys will vote for him too. He is no Deen ('in the disco') with his look, he would fit into Ikea perfectly...

Balkan pride is becoming a them in Eurovision. last year it was the Balkan girls (they like to party like nobody likes to party... apparently) and this year it is Serbian Ethnopop, will it win... i cringe to think, but seriously this year is looking exceedingly average so anything is possible.

In 1982, Yugoslavia sent a Serbian girl group with the most interesting jumpsuits I have ever seen... Aska with 'Halo, halo'. mmm Sexy... not! more scary... be afraid, be very afraid... 

passionpop: (die bitch)
Previous: Portugal

Israel/Israël

Harel Skaat - Milim



This song is a big steaming pile of shit, but hey, its kosher... kinda, sorta... not really. Seriously though this is the ultimate toilet break song because you know nothing is going to happen in the performance same as nothing happens in the song. even if he fucks up, it wont be that bad... unless he falls off the stage and chokes on a cable and dies... and even then it wont be a big loss, atleast for the entertainment world.

yes, it is another bloody music reality show loser. no wonder this song makes my eyes roll back in bordom. you cant groom and idolist to be interesting. you can train them in vocals, but not personality. if personality was displayed by someones hair, then I couldn't write a single word about this guy. where did he get that hair, 1976? no even back then people had better hair! I think he coloured it with boot polish just quietly... that was popular in the 1920s... that almost explains the hair

oh if lights were lasers on gun-sights, I wouldn't have had to hear all of that song. With all Eurovision songs, I listen to them twice, incase I miss the interesting bit, do you know how painful that song was... and then twice! Christ all-fvcken mighty. I cant convey how crap that song is, but I guess his name can... he's the Skaat man after all...

Without talking about the legitimacy of a Middle Eastern country competing in EUROvision, I would like to look at Eurovision history and I mentioned 1976 so that looks like a good year to go to, but I have to mention 1997 first. 1997 Dana International became the first open transsexual to win Eurovision with 'Diva'. Looking at 1976 they either found really ugly women or really cheap female impersonators. they were looking for 'the cheerleader effect' ('Bridesmaid Paradox', 'Sorority Girl Syndrome' ,or 'the Spice Girls Conspiracy' - no I don't watch 'how I met your mother', i just caught an episode), they needed more cheerleaders though. Highlights of this clip and the breast sculpture in the postcards and the conductors hair - which is not at all like this years Israeli Eurovision entry

passionpop: (sweet and innocent)
 Previous: Armenia

Portugal/Portugal

Filipa Azevedo - Há Dias Assim



Is she pregnant? I have read her bio on Eurovision.tv and Wikipedia, and though wikipedias sounds like it s straight from her media release, it doesn't explain to me why she is wearing *that* dress if she is not up the duff. I mean seriously, it looks like she is about to pop... oh you are right, is she was pregnant she would have tits

OK so the surfboard can warble, I don't know why she does though. When she sits on a note it sounds sweet-as, but when she warbles around it to sound like the trendy singers she sounds like... a wanna-be old school Mariah Carey. I wonder if she throws tanties like Mariah used to.... if she doesn't win, we might see one... w00t!

At best this song is a nanna nap or a toilet break... unless in the live show she has a major catastrophe, then it will be entertainment. This song sounds like an reality show song and she is another of the annoying reality show singers in European Idol, I mean Eurovision in 2010. this yeah is looking really.... average...

Portugal's best place in Eurovision was 6th. why never higher? well they keep sending crap to Eurovision, the year after they came sixth, they finished with zero points, not quite the improvement one would expect. In 1966 they came 13th when Madalena Iglésias sung 'Ele e ela'. Have you ever wondered what Dame Edna Everage's dresses look like in black and white... watch this clip.

passionpop: (putting my foot in it)
Previous Bosnia and Herzegovina

Armenia/Arménie

Eva Rivas - Apricot Stone




What I hate most about this song is that I don't entirely hate it. I think this years Eurovision has finally driven me mad. I mean I don't like apricots, I much prefer peaches, and this song is ethnic waffle, but this is really beginning to stand out as the best of a bad bunch... no apricots don't come in bunches... harvest,,, best of a bad harvest... maybe we should harvest Eurovision acts, severing an orb form the source of its life for mass consumption is better than listening to the songs...

WTF sis I just say... OMG I am talking Eurovision Lyric nonsense! I mean this is possibly the right quality for a Eurovision act. I still like In Culto from Lithuania the best, but I think Armenia have a chance to get up there this year.

The performance needs work and also for a chick to win Eurovision, she needs to atleast pretend she is going to show muftage. I am not obsessed with peoples breakfast, it is just that muftage is a drink in the Eurovision drinking game. anyway you don't have to show muftage to win... if you are a Serbian lesbian... (which is more popular than being two  Russian Faux lipstick lesbians) but before her to last female to win Eurovision was Helana Paparizou and the Ukrainian Xena...  OK Sertab Erener was clothed, but she belly-danced. Remember, drunk men vote in Eurovision. 

Enough random Eurovision history, now for Armenias Eurovision history, which is short. They started in Eurovision in 2006, with a song that had potential, and was never gong to win against Lordi, but the performance was average. Andre with 'Without your Love'

passionpop: (putting my foot in it)
Previous Denmark

Bosnia & Herzegovina/Bosnie-Herzigovina

Vukašin Brajić - Lightning And Thunder



is it wrong of me to be amused that he cannot name a 'th' sound through the whole song... possibly a bad choice of song for someone who cannot make a 'th' sound, I mean seeing it will be sung in english and 'thunder' (or tunder) appears to be one of the main words in the song.

OK so it is a song about co-existence and tolerance... but I wanted to see a 'coming out of the darkness and into the light', I mean thats what former Yugoslav countries are known for and it gets a drink in the Eurovision drinking game... what is coming out of the darkness into the light? it is the nod song costume change from black to white. yeah lame as, but someone does it almost every year. Go Bosnia, work on that for us and add this to the song for Eurovision night. Please...

There is nothing special about this song... right down to the fact that a reality singing show contestant is the singer, I mean that appears to be the done thing in Eurovision now. what happened to getting actual musicians into Eurovision... I remember the good ol' days. now since a Idolist won Eurovision, everyone has to be from a singing show. Eurovision is ruined for me... it is still bloody funny though...

talking about funny, Ambasadori with "Ne Mogu Skriti Svoj Bol" (Representing Yugoslavia in 1976). OK not funny, and I appologise for the choice of this clip but I couldn't find a better copy. there is colour wash-out on one side of this clip... but then that only makes this song more interesting..

passionpop: (putting my foot in it)
Previous: Slovakia

Denmark/Danemark

Chanée & N'evergreen - In A Moment Like This




It is always a good move in Eurovision to have a singer represent your country who is very popular in another country, because in eurovision, you cannot vote for yourself. This was done with Vanilla Ninja, an Estonian band who were big in Germany that represented Switzerland. N'evergreen, the Guy, is a danish singer who is huge in the former Soviet countries. do you think this will give this song votes... well they will need them...

If you got two former winners of Idol and got them to release a duet, this is the crud you would expect them to churn out. why does this song keep making me thing of 'Every step you take' by the police?

What is it about Nordic countries and wind machines and I never realised how really white chicks look really bad on TV. I think she needs some powder so she doesn't look like a Vaseline stain on the TV... how you would get a Vaseline stain on the TV, I am not entirely sure... but she has the choice of powder or clothes because that song had too much.... MUFTAGE!!!

Now going back to the third ever Eurovision, why is it all the songs from the 50s and the first half of the 60s sound like songs from movies. anyway Raquel Rastenni with 'jeg rev et blad ud af min dagbog'


passionpop: (putting my foot in it)
 Previous: The Former Yugoslav Republic of Macedonia

Slovakia/ La Slovaquie

Kristina Pelakova - Horehronie




This is one of those fantasy style songs which really belong in a movie or a game and not in Eurovision. It feels like it thinks is is a slowed down version of Wild Dancers from 2004, but it is no where near as interesting a song. nice boots, thats about it

I think the highlight of this clip came at the end when they panned over the crowed and there was a guy sitting in the middle of the screen with what looked like (or more that I hope it was) his girlfriends jacket on his lap. first view I thought it was a big guy wearing a pink ruffle skirt. so this song is like Soccer (European football) the crowd is the most interesting part...

this song is a bit os a snooze and you would hope that it would be later in the night when you are drunk and need a nanna nap, but it is the fourth song in the first semi, so I guess we have to stay awake for this one... damn.

This year is Slovakias 5th attempt at Eurovision and they have never been very successful, they also always sing in slovakian. they have never ever even looked at reaching the top ten, 1998 seeing their best score of 19 points giving them 18th on the night. what did Katarína Hasprová do wrong that night with her song 'Modlitba', you decide...


passionpop: (beer and tits)
Previous: Turkey

The Former Yugoslav Republic of Macedonia/Ex-République Yougoslave de Macédoine

Gjoko Taneski - Jas Ja Imam Silata



I have to be very very careful when writing the review for this song, both my team leader and another girl in my department are of Macedonian decent and we have a rule in my department, 'Don't anger the wog', so my day job could be on the line with this song. In saying that I am no stranger to digging myself into holes so, here goes.

First I saw the stage... I was scared... it looked like something out of Max Headroom or something. then I saw the singer. I now know why Macedonians leave Macedonia.... I have nightmares about heads like that... but I think the scariest think was the Macedonian (c)rap in the refrain. From the stage to the song, everything looks like something out of the 1980s, and that is not always a good thing, this being an example of it not being a good thing...

The lyrics aren't bad, the singing and performance need... more than just a little bit of work. A bit seems to be coming out of the former Yugoslav counties in wog-a-nese which could be detrimental to their polling. This should get through the semi though because Bosnia and Herzegovina and Serbia are both in the same semi, but it wont get much further than that if he sings like he does in this clip... these vocals are almost and act of war, typical bloody mad angry maco's... *hides and prepares to leave country*

Not a single act from Macedonia represented Yugoslavia at Eurovision. Only one Macedonian act ever won the national selection and that was in 1980, then Yugoslavia decided not to enter the contest, testimony to how well Macedonian artist are regarded perhaps?  1998 was Macedonias first attempt to proove musical credibility, then in 2000 they went to Stockholm with '100% te ljubam' by XXL. I dont understand why this was never a hit...
passionpop: (putting my foot in it)
 Previous: Latvia

Turkey/Turquie

maNga - 'We Could Be the Same'



Listen to the crowd go off at the end of that song! Like a frog in a sock... or not... I guess the polite applause though is that this song deserves, I mean it is interesting... I am not saying it is good... it is a Eurovision song after-all, but it is interesting.

Turkey has had a history of pop, and when Sertab Erener won for Turkey, the song was best described as ethno-pop. two years ago, Turkey flirted with a rockier song and entered the contest as a favourite, only to lose to a drugged out Russian pop singer. As a result of the 7th in 2008, Turkey went back to Ethno-pop last year and came 4th. despite this they have gone rocky again... and again come in as a favourite.

as for the performance, I think the singer should have been a model, thats the only explanation I can find for him prancing forwards and backwards up and down the stage. very little left and right, just forwards and backwards. maybe he can learn side to side for Eurovision...

I have found the cmapest song I can find to post to represent Turkeys Eurovsion history. feel the power of the camp. 'Opera' by Çetin Alp and the Short Wave. I think this guy is the Turkish John Travolta. OMG, only Turkey, only 1983...


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