passionpop: (sweet and innocent)
The results of the Jury/Televote breakdown were released this week.

in semi 1 if the Juries ruled, Iceland would not have qualified and Israel would have. I disagree with the Jury on that one. If it was Televote only, Switzerland would have got in over Hungary... they were much of a muchness for me.

in Semi 2 the Jury would have put Croatia and Georgia in over Turkey and Norway. Norway actually finished last in the jury vote in that semi and qualified only because of the higher televote. Bulgaria would have qualified if it wasnt for the jury as would have the Netherlands at the expense of Malta and Ukraine.

The Jury came in to break the bloc voting, however Semi two shows how the jury was worse in its bloc voting than the public was. As far as the juries were concerned, only former Yugoslav country that should not have qualified was Slovenia and the only former Soviet country was Belarus, and they were 11th with the jury.

In the final however, the jury got it closer to right than the public did. Italy and Spain should have finished higher than they did with the combined voting and France deserved more than the nil poi that the televote gave them.

in the end it didn't change who the winner was



in the end the juries fail in what they were brought in to do, which was break the bloc. 

On a side note, if the top five from the televote only went in they would be:

russia
romania
albania
Ireland
Greece
Sweden
Serbia
Lithuania
Turkey
Estonia

the top 5 remaining over the two semis over all that didn't qualify, based on the jury vote would then be:

Ukriane
Moldova
Malta 
Cyprus
Denmark

I have said that the semi results should not be announced until semi two and this is how the semis should be determined, with these results.

in the results for the finals only three countries that were not mentioned above, and were not auto qualifiers finished higher than any on this list.

F.Y.R.Macedonia in 13th
Bosnia & Herzegovina in 18th and
Iceland who finished 19th, but who in my opinion should have finished higher.

with little to no detriment to the final result, we could have made the final a lot shorter and a lot soberer... maybe not a good thing but something to ponder none-the-less

passionpop: (my ass)

a quick round up of the acts in the first semi tonight in Azerbaijan

Montenegro: the humour in this song will be missed by most of the audience. possibly wont qualify as no other former Yugoslav countries are in this semi. odds @200.
Iceland: has gained popularity currently 6th favourite with the bookmakers at $18. epic fantasy ballad but the countries economy will get in the way of a win. will qualify though.
Greece: Minge flashing pop song. will get 12 points from Cyprus which will lead to to qualify from the semi though sits at a payout of 25-40 with the bookies so will qualify, wont win.
Latvia: Very Generation Now, though Anmary isn't. the payout is up to 250 for the win, so not a winner. may qualify just.
Albania: one of the more interesting songs this year. the bookies think it wont qualify, I think it might despite the fact it doesn't go anywhere. 
Romania: always interesting from Romania 5th favourite with the bookmakers, though wont win because Romania never does. what a poor, poor country. BTW learn the dance
Switzerland: borderline qualifier, the song has potential but ruins it with the chorus. payout up to 200 so the bookies think it will get through.
Belgium: my favourite opening line of a song this year. the bookies aren't so endeared by the song with it out to 300 with them. possible qualifier, though improbable
Finland:  the last time Finland went in with a song sung in Swedish, it finished last. the bookies don't think it will be a much better result this time with payouts round 200. she is the fail whale.
Israel: i think someone mentioned to me that this act was picked up on Triple J (in Australia) 9 years ago.Triple J doesn't always play quality music and this song is at up to 225 with the bookmakers so it wont be a winner.
San Marino: possibly the most god-awful thing to ever go to Eurovision and the bookmakers agree with the longest odds for 2012. apparently the performance is pretty good, but the song lets it down. Loser.
Cyprus: similar odds to Greece, who will be giving this song 12 points. will qualify and will likely go top ten. wont win.
Denmark: the bookies have this song in the top ten paying between 14 and 25 despite how plain it is. North Sea oil will get this song votes. I hope it doesn't win though, i couldn't handle another crap winner
Russia: Third favourite with the bookies and will definitely be up their somewhere with the help of all the other former Russian countries. very popular with the fans. will do very well. 
Hungary: another borderline qualifier with Switzerland according to the bookies, but with the amount of borderlines, this might slip through.
Austria: they will have flouros in different places for the semi but the black light will still be there. the song is another borderline with payouts up to 250 for the win. I wouldn't bet on it.
Moldova: my favourite song this Eurovision. The song is nowhere near the favourites in the odds, but it should qualify. if it doesn't, I will cry. I want his trumpet in them... erm...
Ireland: everyone has been waiting for them to return... /sarcasm. if they don't win, will Ireland send them again next year? can they afford to send anyone else... I mean Jedward are obviously going cheap... 14 to 33 is the payout range. typical x-factor winners song. kill them now

passionpop: (my ass)

Performer: Iris
Song: Would you


You have to love a Eurovision song which starts with 'Come inside me'. It doesn't really improve from there either. it stays are a disney pop ballad.... just with that one really non-disney line... 

I almost forgot to review this song. Two and a half months ago I named Belgium as the winner before the song was announced. I then listened to the song when it came out, regretted my call, but never did the write up as to why I regretted it. listening to the song explains it though. 

Kate Middleton has alot to answer for with these high banded dresses. Dear Iris, when you have legs akin to chopsticks, trying to look 'leggy' fails. 

Belgium's song is not the worst thing to go to Eurovision, Luxumburg in 1980 Comes close. and going back to the high band on the dress... there was time when Belgium knew where the waist was. it was 1979

passionpop: (putting my foot in it)
Performer: Compact Disco
Song: Sound of our Hearts



This is the sound of another summer Station ID ad for 7, or a song to advertise the hot, sexy new drama for next season. nothing about the song itself reaches in and grabs you but it uses the word heart and add that to any product and and you have advertising. Add it to Eurovision and you have a bit of a cliche.

I always worry about how they upbeat numbers will sound and will be preformed on the night. With this song though it probably doesn't matter. the bookies are considering it fairly mid-range so it will qualify but wont threaten anyone and I think thats a fair call. 

In the end though, this song isn't terrible, it is just.... done. t would have been a hot favourite 10 years ago but now, this style has been the song for summer. over it! 

Upbeat songs can look a little weird in an expensive dress, or even cheap gym gear, but at least it isn't a boy band from Hungary. 




passionpop: (putting my foot in it)
Performer: Sinplus
Song: Unbreakable

The worst part of this song is the word 'Stream'. every time it is sung, I just want to slap them. What is it about shitty siblings in Eurovision. I think we need to slap them all around a bit. 

Maybe the rise in pitch when singing 'stream' it to add to their attempt to sound like the cure. Actually it sounds like the cure meets U2 meets american pop-crap... though I admit that I love some of the concept in the video. Watching the video on mute is pretty good.

Switzerland have had issues qualifying, and last year was their first qualification in a while. this year I agree with the bookmakers, this wont qualify.  it wants to be rock, but it is just not rock enough

Switzerland knows whats rock enough to qualify, they have qualified with an Estonian girl band, they have also seen a favourite from Andorra that didn't qualify. Anonymous were cool

passionpop: (putting my foot in it)
Performer: Rona NIshliu
Song: Suus



This song has a awesome build up, then stops... it is like getting foreplay, and then no nookie, there is no point. It is certainly one of the more interesting songs in this years contest, but is needs something after that build up... and not the loud/obnoxious noise that we hear... unless the point is a drink int the Eurovision drinking game

Promoting the top ten acts to the final from each semi when there is only 18 acts in each semi just rewards mediocraty, so this song should qualify. in qualifying, this song might damage Italys chance of winning because they appeal to a similar demographic. the songs aren't very much alike, but both the songs have a beauty and a sensuality about them. Italy is a sexy,  and boldly sensual, Albania is emotive in a 'tear me open and see whats inside', emotive sense and its emptiness is a womans emotion, not a girls. 

I don't care for this song. It could have been more and no doubt wonderful ways to abuse this song will be found, it just doesn't hit me. 

The song has a slight feeling of yesteryear, and it is more than the beehive. Acts of those days were... 1968, says it all. As for other things passed, I have to thank the punch for the reminder of this albanian classic 



passionpop: (completely)
Performer: Izabo
Song: Time


Maybe this song required more Time to grow on me. I am undecided though if listening to it more will make me like it more or it will make me homicidal. lest test it... 

The song sounds like something that would be used on an add to advertise health supplements or sugar filled snacks for kids.  I hope it is not used for any of these in Australia though.... for the sake of others advertisers, don't use it. 

I think this belongs in a Eurovision in the late 1970s, not in 2012. they are considered 'alternative', but they come across as being different for the sake of being different, but then it is still a standardly structured pop-song, just with annoying vocals in the chorus. This may qualify though unfortunately. 

So in 2003, it was the 80's coming back, now it is the 70's. Can Estonia send a band to sing that? Or maybe we can just get people who look like previous entries... I mean the lead singer of Izabo, his hair is almost as amazing as that as Israels 1975 entry. 




passionpop: (completely)

Performer: Ivi Adamou
Song: La La Love

Dull, Soulless dance music. This will be big in Malta and Greece, but no one else will really care for this song, and rightfully so. Nothing more really needs to be said... but I will waffle a bit

It is another of last decades Sydney Mardi Gras. My favourite part of the clip is how long her mouth is... The Joker only got a mouth like that with the air of a knife, can you get a mouth like hers with a knife... if you can I fear her plastic surgeon. 

The clip is meant to be based on Snow White, but where are the dwarfs... were they elsewhere being tossed. God I hope this promo clip isn't the best she has got and she actually performs at Eurovision. 

Maybe I am wrong about Malta liking this song. Their crap is better than this, but then Cyprus is a word synonymous with crap


passionpop: (completely)
Performer: Anmary (Linda Amantova)
Song: Beautiful Song


During the first time I heard the first verse of this song, I double checked the lyrics of the song Anmary was sending to Eurovision to make sure that this was the right song. It is. OMG this is for real. Is this a piss-take or is this serious? OMG I think it is serious. 

Whats scary is the more i listen to it, the more I can see its potential to win. It taps into that desire for instant fame that Gen Y onwards has in abundance, without being sung by twats and without being overly factitious.even if it doesnt win, it will atleast be the theme of the next Junior Eurovision, if not this Eurovision. It could so easily be abused in ads. It could be good.... 

It will be a tough qualifying for Latvia seeing that their neighbours are in the other semi. if it qualifies, this will b in the top half of the draw. If this doesn't qualify, it will not be a change in Latvia's recent fortunes. They haven't qualified since 2008. I don't know if I want this to qualify. at least it clarifies that Eurovision is entertainment, and not a song contest. 

If you want to do a dong which demands votes, Lithuania did that best in 2006. As for Latvian Eurovision songs, I loved 'Questa Notte', partly for Latvia singing in italian when no majority italian speaking country was there to vote... even Switzerland only gave them 3 points. 




passionpop: (sweet and innocent)

Performer: Rambo Amadeus (Antonije Pušić)
Song: Euro Neuro

This guy looks like a homeless person scabbing through the bin for dinner, but the due has a degree, competed in international sailing competitions and has been recording satirical music for 20 years. AND HE IS RAMBO! could he be more awesome...

This is one of those good satirical songs that remind us that this is entertainment, and not a music contest. The satire will be wasted in the competition, as always happens. The main reason this song won qualify though is because all on Montenegro's neighbours are in the other semi. 

This should have an awesome performance. for anyone not planning on watching the semis, this is the kind of thing you will miss. This song doesn't sound like much, actually it is filled with WANK which is what I think the point is. at least this song will make the highlights reals of 2012 for the wacky entries

More for the fact that Euro Neuro sounds a bit ahead of its time for Eurovision, and a bit the mention of euro in the title, made me think of a classic from Belgium. Pity most Montenegrin songs aren't so memorable. The last Montenegrin act to qualify for the final was back when Montenegro was still unified with Serbia in 2005




passionpop: (putting my foot in it)
Performer: Pernilla Karlsson
Song: När Jag Blundar

Out of 540 songs submitted to be the potential representative for Finland in Eurovision, this is what was chosen. rally says alot about how poor the the other 539 songs were really. They could have sent this or this (is it just me or is 80's music big in Finland), but no, they sent this. 

This is such a pretty song. It doesn't go anywhere, it doesn't do anything, but it is a pretty song... pretty bloody boring. I mean it isn't Lordi is it? The only practical use for this song to be played in an overpriced candle shop or some hippy shop or something. It shouldnt be in Eurovision. 

The only sure thing about this song is seeing it is sung in Swedish, it will get high points from Sweden in the final... if it makes it to the final, which i highly doubt. I mean the Lyrics arent that bad, they are actually quite, pretty, everything else about the song is awful

The last time Finland sung in Swedish was 1990 and they finished last, and Sweden didn't give Finland any points towards that loss. Before the clip showing why they were so successful, I want to look back at something awful. How not to be interesting

passionpop: (putting my foot in it)
Performer: Mandinga
Song: Zaleilah

Romanians Macerena. there review done. you can go no... after you learn the dance to the song. That's the only fun thing about the song and on the night, getting drunk and trying to do this dance will make it more fun. 

Romania is not the only country to go in with a dance this year. in another non unique item, it isn't the first time Romania have used a PVC catsuit, though last time it was actually fitted, as opposed to being bunched up in the middle. Also when Elena from Mandinga turns on her side, there is an obvious VPL

On a more serious note though, there appears to be this fashion at the moment that if you are wearing a very short dress that barely covers your modesty, you must tuck the end of the dress into the leg of your knickers. If you want an asymmetrical style dress, buy one. don't get a perfectly good dress and shove it up your grannydacks. STOP IT! Now! 

Las Ketchup were famous for a dance, they then went to Eurovision with a follow up single. if they went in with the ketchup song, could they have won Eurovision, I hope not. A year after that, Romania said 'I love you', as many ways as they could in 3 mintutes. 


passionpop: (my ass)
Performer: Greta Salóme & Jónsi
Song: Never Forget

This song sounds like it should be on the sound track album for Game Of Thrones and if it turns up in series 2 I wouldn't be surprised. At least it will have a use after Eurovision now that Series 3 of Game of Thrones has been commissioned. 

Icaland has sent some amazing stuff to Eurovision and have thus far been unlucky to not win the contest. This is in the top 10 in the betting, but it wont win because of economics. Where would Iceland get the money to host the 2013 contest, the bank?

I dont dislike the song, but it lacks a WOW for me. The medieval influenced songs are so done and with the fantasy genre being 'in' atm, you just hear more of it. I don't hate it, i just don't think it is special. 

I started previewing the songs for Eurovision in 2004, which is when Jónsi was last in Eurovision. back then I didnt review all the songs in the contest and Iceland was so good that I ignored it. I now remember why. First to songs for Fantasy soundtracks though from Slovakia

passionpop: (completely)

Performer: Pasha Parfeny
Song: Lăutar


I think if the Cat Empire were from Moldova, this is what they could sound like. Oh yeah it is ethno pop, but this is currently my favourite song in this years Eurovision. Bow-ties are cool. this song is so fun

Maybe it is the cute boys in the clip that makes me forgive the engrish, or maybe I just like the innuendo in the line 'This trumpet makes you my girl'. I want to see someone use that as a pick up line. I guess I would have to go to Moldova for that though. Did I mention that this song is fun?

This song is no where near the favourites, it sits around 100/1, but it is so fun. It most reminds me of Crazy Summer Dance, the song that should have gone to Eurovision for Serbia and Montenegro in 2006 (yes I will never get over that), but this is going to Eurovision and it is fun. I want it to qualify for the final just so I can drunkenly dance around the house to it twice. It is so fun!

Moldova Has sent us some of the most interesting songs in Eurovision. Until 2009, Pasha was a member of the band that represented Moldova in 2010, you know the one with the epic Sax guy? he even performed with Sunstroke project in their attempt to qualify for the 2009 Eurovision (where they came third in national selection and were a bit crap). talking about crap, This is the usual attempt at ethno-pop for Eurovision, though Turkey sent a singer from Belgium to sing Dum Tek Tek. What a wondrous and truly international contest this Eurovision is

passionpop: (big)
Performer: Soluna Samay
Song: Should've Known Better


And this years Idol winners song is 'Should've known better'. It is that completely innocuous kind of song you expect an idol winner to sing. My god it is PLAIN!  She is PLAIN! There is nothing interesting or truly different about this song to make it stand out, that means it could well win. 

I did call last years winner an Idol song too, but the difference was Azerbaijan had a MILF, a gay pin up, a heap of oil money and a will to win. I am not saying that Azerbaijan bought Eurovision, but if Denmark wins this year, then I would definitely say the title of winner is up for sale. 

Denmarks last win was with a very average song too, and Denmark likes to send average acts and on the law of averages Denmark could win... being  average. OK this is quite a polished average, but i just want some more songs that are good rather than average.... is that too much to ask of Eurovision?

So the History of Average goes back. everyone can be average, Including ON-J, but Denmark do average justice


passionpop: (putting my foot in it)

Performer: Eleftheria Eleftheriou
Song: Aphrodisiac


I understand what she is trying to do. She is imitating Helena Paparitzou's performance from 2005. She has 4 dancers, the hair and the ethnic influences (in sound and performance). The difference was My Number One was a good song with an excellent performance. If Paparitzou languished at the bottom of a discount bin for several years, this is how she could end up, but I doubt she could be this cheap and nasty.

Eleftheria lacks something that Helena had in abundance... talent, but I am sure she makes up for that by sleeping with the manager of the record company and anyone else she needs to. Maybe it is the platforms, but she can't dance! If you cant dance in platforms, don't wear them when performing a dance routine... simple. 

At least she will entertain us on the night. when we aren't taking cheap shots at how cheap she looks, we will be laughing at the commentators attempt to say her name. Eleftheria Eleftheriou... hell I am sure we will make a few attempts to say it while drunk which will only end badly, but we will get a laugh. 

The Greek entry this year could only hope to look as cheap as the Ukraine did in 2009, and Greece didn't always send affordable acts to Eurovision... 




passionpop: (Default)
Performer: Jedward
Song: Waterline

You may remember Jedward for last year... yes this is the same Jedward, they are back to inflict more pain on the Eurovision audience. This year they have a song that sounds like it belongs on Glee! I hate Glee! though this song is catchy, I hate it. The more likeable it is the more I hate it

My mate who i was having coffee with today pointed out how with the amount of product they have in their hair, how flammable that that makes them...  how do we get them close enough to a flame? also did Jedward meet Dima Bilan last year at Eurovision or something, because one of them has possibly got into the former winners stash... If you know what I mean....

This song is so annoyingly catchy and so well aimed at the tweenie market that it could plausibly do very well, that is not the worst thing though. the worst thing is that they are only 'close to the Waterline' and not beneath it. Also are they wearing leggings with cod-pieces in them? 

If you want an annoyingly likelable song, go to Iceland as opposed to Ireland. Sylvia Nott was one of the best, though her song was satirical and the joke was missed on the audience. Waterline is so annoyingly likeable. The final version of 'Waterline' is Better than last years 'Lipstick', though they seem to have something about simple song titles. 




passionpop: (putting my foot in it)
Performer: Valentina Monetta
Song: The Social Network Song (OH OH - uh- UH OH)


You know how when your parents try to sound cool and try to use the current lingo which is actually dreadfully out of date. Imagine a three minute song full of that. Seriously. It isnt like the singer is a grandma, she is only 2 years older than me, but this is so outdated that the you would think the singer is 50. There is absolutely no redeeming feature about this song. 

The Singer is a Mickey Mouse Club has been at best. The song belongs in the mockumentary 'Get Ready to be Boyzvoiced'.... at best and even sounds a bit like one of the songs from said mocko. This song is an Epic Fail

The song was originally "Facebook (OH OH - uh- UH OH)", a song that contains a commercial brand breaches the rules, so they had to change the song. The removed all reference to Facebook form the lyrics, but it does still mention 'Googling' which has got to border lining disqualification still. it would be better if this was disqualified, then we wouldn't have to hear it. It is also better that N00b parents don't hear it because lines like 'Do you wanna play cyber sex again' will put fear into parents of their 11 year old is really doing on the internet. Yes, they are talking to a paedophile, get them off line now... 

I cannot think of anything as truly awful as this that has gone to Eurovision. I am not saying that nothing this bad has gone to Eurovision, I have just drunk them out of my mind, So instead here something that was so bad it was good by the same song writer (Ralph Siegel), followed by the Emos from San Marino from the country's first Eurovision


passionpop: (completely)
Performer: Trackshittaz
Song: Woki Mit Deim Popo (Shake your booty)

This is possible the classiest song in this years Eurovision, it is class with a capital ASS... literally. if this wasn't so tongue-in-cheek, it would border on bringing the contest into disrepute or something. 

here are some lyrics (translated to english):
Your booty has feelings
Your booty is a part of you
Don’t just leave it on the chair
Your booty has an opinion, yeah
Your booty wants to move

makes it sound like the subject of the song has worms right? that and well... body parts having an opinion is a guy thing, you know, the man brain is in the lower part of the body, and bootys don't think, they fart.

The song is catchy, I will give it that, but i fear it will be the only thing more annoying than Jedward... though it is early days.  Maybe there can be something more annoying than this, or maybe I will have a frontal lobotomy and like this song... though a bottle in front of me is more likely... 

Ethno-Hip-Hop is not new to Manurovision, Remember Greenjolly from 2005 and I never understood why people get Australia and Austria confused.... until this song



passionpop: (sweet and innocent)

is it really that time of the year again....

Performer: Buranovskiye Babushki
Song: Party for Everybody!

You have that crazy great aunt who gets drunk at family dos and then tries to be cool with the kids.... now multiply them by 6 (well actually 8 but only 6 are allowed to perform at Eurovision)

These little old ladies should be living it up in a nursing home somewhere, not being travelling performers to earn money to build a church, which is seriously what they are doing, they want to build a church by singing... that is like curing cancer by praying, but anyways. 

This is also what the people wanted to send to Eurovision, they voted for this. I am fairly sure though that Russians, even after a couple of decades of democracy, still don't get this voting concept. They still, allegedly, vote for Vladimir Putin afterall. 

If enthusiasm counts for anything, this is a winner... and despite this even making news here in Australia, I don't think it should win... I hope it doesn't... else 12 months of 'Party for everybody. Dance! Come on and dance. Come on and dance. Come on and boom-boom'... 

it reminds me of Moldova in 2005 and is no where near as coked out as what Russia sent in 2006




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