passionpop: (my ass)
possible spoiler )


realistically though, if you are not in the top 4 in the semi, you wont do well in the final. it is rare to win when you did not finish first in your final. it can be done, 'Wild Dancers' and 'Running Scared' finished second in their respective semis and won. 'Believe' won from third in the semi in 2008. generally you need to win your semi.

I would really like to see the jury v televote results. but at the moment. there has been the question of if the first semi had the right amount of neighbour countries. some think neighbour voting it ruining Eurovision. the truth is though that if you dont qualify now, you wont win in the final if the semis are stacked better anyways. is it better to allow neighbours to stack themselves in the final so they have to spread their votes amongst more neighbours. this means that the non-aligned countries that do qualify for the final have a better chance to win.

there were heaps of countries I wanted to see qualify, namely Croatia (13th) and Latvia (17th) but if they couldn't get the votes to get out of the semi, they would not have got enough votes to win and what is the use of going into the final if you don't win? if you are not competing in the final, you can get drunk all night so win-win.

not like much of Eurovision is a win, but anyways

passionpop: (putting my foot in it)

the following songs failed to qualify from the first Eurovision Semi final. now with clips

so, the losers are

here )

passionpop: (subliminal)

So close yet so far away. Tuesday night will be the first Semi thought it will be a week before the show is screened in Australia. Rehearsals have started which are available online.

here is the list of the songs in the first Semi final

Austria: watch out for the floating condoms on stage
Estonia: is the pregnant woman wearing a teepee on the night
Slovenia: that appears to be an interesting outfit
Croatia: they sing that they don't have anything and that quite literal with the staging
Denmark: Still the favourite but I still don't care for it
Russia: She's got balls.
Ukraine: Is the Giant seriously going to feature on stage on the night? OK, not so much giant. A big guy in moon boots.HODOR!!!
The Netherlands: seems that the staging may feature birds. Who saw that coming...
Montenegro: appears that Who See are space cadets
Lithuania: the back drop may be a bit hypnotic for the druggy singing
Belarus: expect this to go downhill after the entrance
Moldova: A big sparking Christmas tree fairy, that gets bigger...
Ireland: Denmark may try to be influenced by Celtic stylings, but Ireland shows a big Celtic Cross in the background top show who's boss
Cyprus: expect her to spend hours curling her hair only to sing in front of a wind machine
Belgium: are the dancers wearing Asymmetrical dresses? I used to have one of those.
Serbia: one of the girls appears to be missing a large portion of the front of her dress in rehearsals. I hope the find it for her in the next couple days.

passionpop: (dead)
Country: Montenegro

History...
Debut: 2007
Previous Appearances: 4
Wins: 0

2013...
Artist: Who See
Song: Igranka



This could be the first song to get Montenegro into the final. That doesn't mean I like it, it sounds like anything else you would hear in a nightclub, but that’s why people might like it and vote for it.

What I don't get in the clip is why do the singers need bit yellow raincoats? Is it to keep moisture out or in? I know boys who would have a lot of moisture in their raincoat if they were watching that mud wrestling...

I don't really care for this and nor do the bookies, but it is a borderline qualifier because this kids will probably like it.

I think we have hit a Euro Neuro

passionpop: (subliminal)
Country: Cyprus

History...
Debut: 1981
Previous Appearances: 30
Wins: 0

2013...
Artist: Despina Olympiou
Song: An Me Thimáse



Twelve points from Greece! Unless it doesn't qualify for the final or someone else gives Greece money for their votes because Greece would do anything for money. Lets face it, so would Cyprus and that’s the only reason why Cyprus is in the competition this year, to sell their votes to the highest bidder.

Granted this is a pretty ballad, and it appears that Despina can sing, but there is enough pretty in this years contest and without 'friends' to get it into the final, this wont make it, and the bookies agree.

Lets hope Cyprus can afford an entry next year so they can get that elusive win, because this year wont be the one.

Please try again Cyprus. Keep coming back and Mi Stamatas

passionpop: (die bitch)
Country: Serbia

History...
Debut: 2007
Previous Appearances: 6
Wins: 1 (2007 - Marija Šerifović 'Molitva')

2013...
Artist: Moje 3
Song: Ljubav je svuda



Did we need a girl group this year? Well we have one. This year was kinda low on girl groups, actually I think this may be the only girl group this year. Not totally a bad thing though if we had one less girl group, I wouldn't mind...

The girl dressed as the devil doesn’t need the platform stiletto pumps. She prances like a horse in them, though it is hard to do anything else in those kind of shoes. Those shoes belong on a run way or on a drag queen. They are the only times they are acceptable. Though maybe she is a drag queen... hmmm

this is better than most stuff aimed at teen girls, but it is still girl group. It will probably qualify only because there Is no competition in the girl group category, which is a category that only ever appeals to 15 year old girls and 40 year old men for some reason. I don't understand.

this is one of the countries I expect little from partly because... Ovo Je Balkan

passionpop: (subliminal)
Country: Lithuania

History...
Debut: 1994
Previous Appearances: 13
Wins: 0

2013...
Artist: Andrius Pojavis
Song: Something



You know if his eyebrows weren't so excitable, he would be cute. Pity.

The song is cheap radio fodder sung by a meth head. Oh it may not be meth but he is clearly on 'Something'

the bookies don't rate this and I think the only votes will come in because of his looks and not for the quality of the song

Something that cannot always be said to Eurovision act is that You Got Style

passionpop: (Default)
Country: Belarus

History...
Debut: 2004
Previous Appearances: 9
Wins: 0

2013...
Artist: Alyona Lanskaya
Song: Solayoh



A few months ago a shop assistant showed me how to make a scarf into an open vest like top. Great to see guys can wear scarves live that too.

The music makes sounds like belly dancing music and Alyona appears to try to belly dance in a few bits, but it is hard to belly dance when your belly is covered. I don't get what cha-cha has to do with belly dancing though.

The bookies rate this a reasonable chance, but I don't. It isnt that it is dire, it is is just that belarus doesn't have much of a history with success at eurovision, and even with a reasonable song, they often struggle to make the finals

Glad that's over. Hasta La Vista

passionpop: (completely)
Country: Belguim

History...
Debut: 1956
Previous Appearances: 54
Wins:1 (1986 - Sandra Kim 'J'aime la vie')

2013...
Artist: Roberto Bellarosa
Song: Love Kills



If you are going into a music career, you have a massive advantage if you have a big nose, you can snort more lines. OK it may lead to a tragically short career, or a mercifully short one, depending on ones point of view, but at least you get value out of all you can snort events.

Nasal capacity aside, this is reasonably inoffensively radio music. It is not exciting nor is it completely boring, it is just... meh. Thats the only word I can use to describe this one, meh. Meh!

The bookies don't rate this as a qualifier and, though it might scrape through, I don't rate it either.

Ah, this is Euro-Vision

passionpop: (southpark)
Country: Estonia

History...
Debut: 1994
Previous Appearances: 18
Wins: 1 (2001 - Tanel Padar/Dave Benton/2XL 'Everybody')

2013...
Artist: Birgit
Song: Et Uus Saaks Alguse



Is she wearing a nighty? I think she is wearing a nighty. Look love, we know you are pregnant, but that's no excuse to go out on stage in a nighty. I wonder how pregnant she is and if she could give birth on the stage at Eurovision. Wouldn't be the messiest thing that’s been on the Eurovision stage in history if she did.

This is a well sung ballad and I care nothing for it. I am far more interested in the nighty and where I can get one just like it. Maybe it is an Estonian thing...

This song is quite rightly a long shot. It will possibly qualify but wont scare the favourites.

More ballads and sleep will come over me Nagu merelaine

passionpop: (putting my foot in it)
Country: Moldova

History...
Debut: 2005
Previous Appearances: 8
Wins: 0

2013...
Artist: Aliona Moon
Song: O Mie



A toilet roll holder doll with a strange hairdo and an over inflated opinion of her singing ability.

So what’s good about it... well it ends. Also with the obnoxious noises she emits, that's a drink in the drinking game, but I'm hoping to be drunk before this song comes on at number 12 in the semi.

Last years backing vocalist comes back this year as a toilet break. I am surprised the bookies think this may qualify because I don't

It is great to have Moldova in the contest, we are So Lucky

passionpop: (die bitch)

Country: Slovenia

History...
Country: Slovenia

History...
Debut: 1993
Previous Appearances: 18
Wins: 0

2013...
Artist: Hannah
Song: Straight into Love





The Bookies don't give this much better than a snowballs chance in hell, but come on, this should qualify, it is not complete crap is it? Ok well maybe

Dull soulless dance music by a dancefloor diva. I love how the base under my desk thumps to this song. I think we should mute the American and dance.

Her singing isn't bad, there is possibly too much of it though, but I cant see why this shouldn't qualify. It isn't the most dire song this year by a long way.

This year is the 58th Eurovision. I wonder if it could go For a Thousand Years...


passionpop: (putting my foot in it)
Country: Ireland

History...
Debut: 1965
Previous Appearances: 46
Wins: 7 (1970 – Dana 'All Kinds of Everything', 1980 – Johnny Logan 'What's another Year', 1987 – Johnny Logan 'Hold Me Now', 1992 – Linda Martin 'Why Me?', 1993 - Niamh Kavanagh 'In Your Eyes', 1994 - Paul Harrington & Charlie McGettigan 'Rock 'n' Roll Kids', 1996 - Eimear Quinn 'The Voice')

2013...
Artist: Ryan Dolan
Song: Only Love Survives



This song has promise, and that promise is to be used as a network promo somewhere around the world. Channel Ten in Australia probably already has dibs on it to promote some dancing contest show. Wait for it on equivalent networks internationally.

This is desperately trying to be a gay/dancefloor anthem. I can see the section from 34 seconds to 1.04 being used in various mixes by rather average DJs. It is sad that someone would go to the effort to assemble a 3 minute song that is purposely designed to used as five 30 second samples ever. I am not criticising the attention span of the average nightclub punter.... ok so I am but so what. Life is a novel, not a pamphlet, live it that way

This will qualify, and it deserves to, it is good enough to. Some years reindeer farts are good enough to qualify though so it doesn't say much.

They say making it to Eurovision is the Chance of a Lifetime...

passionpop: (subliminal)
Country: The Netherlands

History...
Debut: 1956
Previous Appearances: 53
Wins: 4 (1957 - Corry Brokken 'Net als toen', 1959 - Teddy Scholten 'Een beetje', tie 1969 – Lenny Kuhr 'De troubadour', 1975 - Teach-in 'Ding-a-Dong')

2013...
Artist: Anouk
Song: Birds



This is up there with the favourites and I can understand why. It isn't the sound you expect. I have gone through just over 1/3 of the acts for 2013, but this could be the one. Not that I am ever right (except in 2009), but this could be just different enough to win.

It is quite dark and dreamlike. I would say nightmarish, but it doesn't have fear or anger. It is dark and sung so beautifully. Damn, I like it.

The Netherlands have only qualified for the final once since the semi final came in, this is an easy qualifier

I wish you got this kind of surprise more often when you asked someone to Sing Me a Song

passionpop: (southpark)
Country: Russia

History...
Debut: 1994
Previous Appearances: 16
Wins: 1 (2008 – Dima Bilan 'Believe')

2013...
Artist: Dina Garipova
Song: What If



What if we all bought a copy of this song and gave the world another example of slacktivism. What if we actually did something and what if the singer didn't actually care what we did as long as she got her sack of potatoes at the end of the day. What if I am just being cynical...

What if this song was just a call to communism? Just saying.

This is up with the favourites (6th atm), but I think that's an affordability factor, Russia can put money into Eurovision 2014 and not all countries in Europe can say that. It it also a similar theme to Believe which won in 2008 for Russia so it is a maybe but I still don't care for it

Dina is from Tatarstan. Perhaps they should have sent someone else, perhaps a Northern Girl

passionpop: (die bitch)
Country: Denmark

History...
Debut: 1957
Previous Appearances: 41
Wins: 2 (1963 – Grethe & Jørgen Ingmann 'Dansevise', 2000 - Olsen Brothers 'Fly on the Wings of Love')

2013...
Artist: Emmelie de Forest
Song: Only Teardrops



This is the current favourite with the bookmakers, and I don't understand why. Admittedly I was never hugely impressed with last years winner or the year before that or even the year before that, but this song doesn't appear to have much going for it, except that Denmark could afford to host next years event.

Barefoot and messy hair, that looks familiar, where have I seen that? Oh that's right, last years winner. When it comes to copying previous winners Denmark is up there with the best, which is possibly why they have had so few wins in their own right. Maybe they should spend less time copying and more time finding a decent act

I am not saying this performance inst decent. It is dull and the song isn't anything special, but it will qualify because Denmark has friends.

Denmark's first win was controversial after Norways points distribution changed. If something like that happened again would we cry foul, would we ask to see the Video, Video

passionpop: (big)
Country: Austria

History...
Debut: 1967
Previous Appearances: 45
Wins: 1 (1966 – Udo Jürgens 'Mercie, Chérie')

2013...
Artist: Natália Kelly
Song: Shine



This song is fine until the vocal gymnastics start. I will put up with vocal masturbation so long as it is adding content to the song with words, but when it is nothing but the singer orgasming over themselves, I have no time for it.

The song starts of pleasant, and Natália proves herself to be quite a good little performer. Looking at her Bio on wikipedia, it is getting her to stop performing thats the trick. At least we know that she will give us a performance on the night.

Even if 'Shine' doesn't qualify for the final, it will be an improvement on the Austrian result of last year. It is hard to do worse than last though, so Go Natália...

In the end, this is Eurovision and it is all about the Musik

passionpop: (subliminal)
Country: Croatia

History...
Debut: 1993
Previous Appearances: 20
Wins: 0

2013...
Artist: Klapa s mora
Song: Mižerja



This is possibly the first time Croatia has sent something to Eurovision of quality. This is something I almost actually like. Hell has frozen over. I almost NEVER like the Croatian entry

I do have a thing for good vocal ensembles so I am biased in that regard, but I think this will do well. It will certainly qualify mainly with the help of the 'grey vote', thank you oldies. The Bookmakers however don't like it so it wont win.

If Croatia had better looking men, this would have a better chance to win, shame really.

And now for a bit of Eurovision Nostalgija

passionpop: (die bitch)
Country: Ukraine

History...
Debut: 2003
Previous Appearances: 10
Wins: 1 (2004 – Ruslana 'Wild Dancers')

2013...
Artist: Zlata Ognevich
Song: Gravity



A couple years ago songs started showing up in Eurovision that sounded more like they should be the theme music for a fantasy TV series. This is not a good thing. In this song it was maybe good for the first verse, but not everything after.

Lyrically this is a little bit 'what tha...', but then you get that a lot from the Ukraine. A highlight this year is 'I’m like a butterfly, Spinning ‘round a sword as if to dare, I should have stayed up high'. I am sure it is something really meaningful when translated to Ukrainian, but in english... what tha?

What offends me the most is the little princess singing it. I am over the middle class social climbers who think they are talented enough and deserve to be famous singers. You are no more talented than a Kardashian, I'm sorry.

There is a slight link between this years song and the entry from 2006, both singers performed for the military at the time of their entry. I wonder what the response was from the men in the military when they were asked to 'Show me Your Love'

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